6 Tips for Handling Divorce When You Have Teenagers

 Posted on February 13, 2024 in Divorce

Whenever parents get a divorce, it can be a challenging time for children regardless of the circumstances. Often, when thinking about children in divorce, people picture younger children in custody disputes, questions about parenting time, and the logistics involved for parents needing to figure out who will get them to and from their homes, school, playdates, and other after-school activities. However, when the children in a divorce are teenagers, it can be challenging as well. Since adolescence is a formative time in child development, some parents might avoid divorce even if they are in an unhappy marriage, simply to limit the turbulence their children will go through in those years. If you have teenagers and are in an unhappy marriage, a compassionate Arlington Heights, IL divorce lawyer can offer important guidance.

Tip 1: Do Not Badmouth Your Spouse

As negatively as you might feel toward your spouse, that person is still your child’s other parent. Hearing you express negativity about them can be emotionally draining and even traumatic for your child.

Tip 2: Encourage Open and Honest Communication

Make sure your children know they can speak with you about anything. Let them know that they can ask you any questions they have and that you will endeavor to be honest about the entire situation. If they know they do not need to keep things from you, it can take a burden off their shoulders.

Tip 3: Give Them Space for Their Emotions

Connected to the above tip about being open and honest, your children need to know that however they feel about the situation is okay. Let them know that their feelings are valid, and make sure to repeat this often and offer support however you can.

Tip 4: Maintain Routines

Without routines, teenagers can go down a slippery slope, letting schoolwork and friendships suffer. Even though you are dealing with your own valid, difficult emotions about your divorce, it is best to keep to routines as much as possible for your children’s sake.

Tip 5: Consider Professional Help

Teenagers sometimes express anger or depression when their parents are going through a divorce. While this can be a normal reaction, it is also important to seek parental guidance from a therapist or let your child have their own space to discuss such matters with a therapist geared toward them and their experience. Professional help can ease your child’s suffering and might benefit the entire family.

Tip 6: Encourage Coping Mechanisms

Your child might find any number of ways to express their emotions and cope with them. This might happen through art, music, sports, or anything else that works for them. See how you can encourage your child to use this avenue to help them cope with the situation.

Contact an Arlington Heights, IL Divorce Lawyer

If you have teenagers at home and are concerned about how a divorce might affect them, an experienced Arlington Heights, IL divorce attorney can offer vital insight into the process. Please call A. Traub & Associates at 847-749-4182 so we can set out on this path together.